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Monday, December 19, 2011

Totoo Kaya Ito?

Lukas Pascual
So callboy ka pala talaga kasi may naka chat ako sa Grindr eto sabi:

Pokpok ka daw at may jowa ka sa Mandaluyong. Ayoko sana maniwala pero ikaw daw yun e. Sana sinabi mo na lang binayaran na lang kita para kantutin.

Gago ka, ginalang galang pa kita, AMBABOY mo pala.

Sunday, December 18, 2011

Ang Kagilagilalas na Pakikipagsapalaran ng Isang Poser

Masarap pala maging isang Poser.

May tumatawag sa iyo na "Baby," "hotstuff," "asawa ko," at kung anu ano pang pet name.

Hindi bro, hindi tol, hindi "hoy."

Nagkakandarapa sila makipagkita sa iyo. Nagmamakaawa silang kausapin mo sila.

Sa buong stay ko sa Grindr, ngayon lang ako inabutan ng lowbatt kaka grind. Pota, na late pa nga ako dahil naaaliw ako sa mga messages e.

Oo nanloloko ako ng mga tao.
Oo ineexpose nila ang mga sarili nila sa akin.

Pero that is sooo much better than all these fucking years staring at all those closed doors.

Bigla bigla, may susi ka.

Bigla bigla, binubuksan nila para sa iyo.

Alam mo'ng hindi talaga para sa iyo yun, but what's a little mistaken identity?

Walang galang galang sa taong gutom.

Magagalit ka ba? E hindi naman ako magkakaganito kung pinagbigyan man lang ako ng kahit isang putanginang nilalang na mahalin man lang ako pabalik?

I am a Monster. Yes I am.

But monsters create monsters. Hindi nanganganak ng pusa ang isang aso. Ang HALIMAW, ILULUWAL DIN NG ISA PANG HALIMAW.

May mga times na may nag confront sa akin, tanong bakit ako ganun. Alam mo, hindi naman nila ako makukumbinsi sa mga dahilan nila, e. E putangina, sa maghapon ba naman ako online, may magmemessage sa iyo na IISANG tao, pag naghanap pa ng ibang pic, effort ka pa hanap ng magandang shot di ba... Tapos hindi ka trip.

O kaya yung hingi ng hingi ng pic, hingi ng hingi... Naghihintay lang magbigay ka ng pic na hindi maganda anggulo.

Putangina di ba?

Yang mga "sana ok ka na soon"

GAGO KA BA?

Kung jowain mo na lang ako?

Yun lang naman makakapagpatigil sa akin sa posing e.

Kapag nahanap ko na ang taong magmamahal sa akin pabalik.

At alam ko wala sa Grindr yun. Good luck naman.

Monday, December 5, 2011

My Life as a Poser

I have a Grindr account. I put my best most recent photograph on it and update it everyday. I get a few comments now and then, but ive only met 2 people in my entire stay; and no sex, no 2nd dates. (although I'd love to)

One day, this schmück with a torso pic messaged me after I said hi or hoy, a typo:

I was devastated. I always thought i was less attractive; but I believed what my friends keep telling me: "IT'S THE PERSONALITY THAT COUNTS, GOOEY"

And I believed that. I get loads of friends with that belief. FRIENDS, YES. BOYFRIENDS, NO.

Apparently, still, and it is a rule of engagement in the animal kingdom to look attractive for you to gain a mate.

Walang hayop sa balat ng lupa ang magsasabi ng katulad ng kanta ni Andrew E. Na HUMANAP KA NG PANGET. E putangina naman e, si Andrew E hindi naman panget ang napangasawa, lahat ng kanta niya tungkol sa magaganda at seksing babae e. Niloloko nyo lang ako e.

Everything started flooding back; I was in Bulacan all over again, felt ugly and unwanted and all that shit; I felt like killing myself and all the response I ever got was, "You're so nega."

I closed down my own Grindr account.

So there I was, sulking and grumbling for a day and a half. I hated my looks I hated how I sounded; how thinning my hair was; how crooked my teeth were; and I rembered someone I hated because he had all that--- he can get away with being an asshole becaue of his looks.

I rummaged my Picasa® and downloaded a lot of old photos Ive saved.

I redownloaded Grinder and created a new account.

Violá.

I've become a poser.

They showed me their face pictures, theur naked shots, their dick pics, pics with cum, they gave me their numbers, their addresses, their HIV statuses. Everything.

These people wouldn't have given me the time of day jad I provided them my real picture. Heck, between the identity I took and my own identity, i received 300% more messages than I would by being perky.

And perky is tiring!

I didn't need to be nice or sensitive because they thought I was attractive. They found me sexy so they didn't take offense at my being forward.

Seriously, if you have a pretty face, people are MUCH MUCH NICER. this guy has a very depressing profile page in FB, if i wrote that much negativity on my page i'd ibstantly get disses like, "GROW UP." or "YOU'RE SO NEGA."

But this guy posts his problems on his page(he's bipolar. I knew him) and people send out their love.

Like, it's discriminatory.

Like this son of a bitch will care.

And people will usually say, "oh it's just you.

EXACTLY. It's me, so I won't be me. You can get what you want an I can get a little bit of what I want pretending to be someone else.

I've never had so much fun chatting as myself; I simply show another photo and pretend and violá, better treatment. Just loke getting a fake diploma and transcript or license from RECTO. You suddenly can.

Thing is, people who wouldnt show you their faces will OFFER their photos for you to respond to them. It's wierd. I felt like im switching from economy to business class.

It was UNREAL.
Literally and figuratively.

And I do it so well. I told soneone this wasnt me on the profile abd he wouldnt believe me.

He set up to meet with me today and didn't notice me so I left. Knowing that I told him my true identity and even showed him a photo of my ugly mug, I asked him why he stood me up. He said he didnt and really wanted to see me.

Apparently to him, GOOEY was the made-up character.

I used to ABHOR posers. We treat them like cockroaches, feeding on other people's identities and getting what tey want.

Actually they don't.

They can't meet up.
They can't reveal themselves.
They can't have sex even if they really really like the person they're talking to.

IT'S REALLY THE RESPECT THEY COULDN'T HAVE BECAUSE WE ARE ALWAYS INCLINED TO BE NICER TO NICER LOOKING PEOPLE.

Why not look nice?

Well some people like me can't fake it. We look this way because people keep reminding us that we do. There are days like Valentines, Christmas, New Year, etc, where all of our married and hitched up friends stay with their other halves, and we single folks try to come up with the best diversion so we dont notice it.

Society--- The gay community in particular puts BEAUTY is such a high pedestal that nothing else matters.

This guy is ENTIRELY RIGHT:

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